According to my interactive movie list, Burn: Cycle is the last known I-movie left in the experiment, for the PC. There could be other games whose I-movie-ness I am unaware of. Plus, I have at least one more I-movie for each the Sega CD, Sega Saturn, and Mac systems. I’m seeing that precious light at the end of this cold, dark, interactive tunnel.

Burn: Cycle is a 1994 CD-i title that encompasses puzzle play and 3D graphics with live action footage. The game's star, Sol Cutter, is a small-time data thief whose latest steal at the beginning of the game comes with a nasty sting. The Burn:Cycle virus has been implanted in his head and has given him a two-hour realtime deadline to find a cure before his brain deteriorates completely.

Burn: Cycle didn’t work for me. I’m not sure how I should feel about that, necessarily. When I popped in the first of the 2 game discs, it offered to let me play right away, off the CD-ROM:

Burn Cycle (stylized as Burn:Cycle) is a 1994 surrealist cyberpunk point-and-click adventure video game for the CD-i that incorporates full motion video. The game's star, Sol Cutter, is a computer hacker and small-time data thief whose latest steal at the beginning of the game comes with a nasty sting. BURN CYCLE is the perfect keto energy drink product with proven weight-loss ingredients in one easy-to-mix drink. Use BURN CYCLE to get a quick boost of energy before you hit the gym (or as the perfect mid-afternoon pick-me up!) and is perfect for keto because it accelerates the way your body naturally metabolizes fat into energy!

So far so good, and I appreciate the no-nonsense, no-install-hassle, cut-straight-to-the-chase attitude of this game. Pressing the Play button is rewarded by this dialog:

This is one of the worst kind of cryptic error messages you can possibly receive. Generally, it means that your machine is just too advanced to run this ancient software. The dialog reads: “Application Error: BURNCYCL caused a General Protection Fault in module 0417 1DE7BURNCYCL will close.” The only reason I typed out that text was so that Google could pick it up and hapless googlers can find this site and learn that, although someone else shares their pain, there is still no hope.

Burn Cycle Mac Os 11

Next, I tried my Windows 95 VMware image. It didn’t GPF but it also didn’t play due to this error:

Burn Os X

This must be a hardcore I-movie, without even subtitles. This is when I finally recognize that this Win95 install isn’t set up to recognize VMware’s virtual ENS1371 audio hardware. I have no idea how to set it up, either, or maybe it’s more trouble than I care to bother with. That brings tonight’s experiment to a screeching halt.

Mac Os Download

There is hope, however. This game is for Windows 3.1, Windows 95, and Mac. I am trying to get an emulated Mac environment running for another Mac-only I-movie in my pile. Failing that, there’s always — groan — an actual Win3.1 or Win95 machine.